Swine flu. Run for my life!
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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