the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize
