FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
