Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize