I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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