Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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