If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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