Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
