I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
how drunk are you?
Several
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
