thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize
