so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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