I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I made him laugh his dick is mine
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
