you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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