There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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