Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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