Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
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Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
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Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
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