fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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