John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize