remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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