I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize