I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
and you fell through a lawn chair
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
