Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
