Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize