We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
