she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
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