i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
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Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.