I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.