So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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