Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Send help, water and tortillas.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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