Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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