No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
The beers last night were like the tears from god
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
how does that bad decision feel?
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