break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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