Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
