I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it