Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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