how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize