Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
