i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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