So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
