My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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