no. you can't hotbox the world.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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