i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Come share oat with me in your robe
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
