the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
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once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
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I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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