OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize