fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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