my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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