If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
