Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
