Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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