It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize