I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize
