You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
