At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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